Parenting my Defiant Child: Privileges to be earned or taken away based on behavior

Concrete expectations and consequences are so important with my son. I made some charts to list privileges he can earn and lose, and behaviors to warrant those gains and losses. I made it in a kid friendly format so that he can understand very clearly what kinds of behaviors earn privileges verses what kinds of behaviors lose those privileges.

Privileges and Behavior

Privileges to be earned or taken away based on behavior

Privilege	(picture)
I-Pad	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\20100129_ipad-2[1].jpg$
Music	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\600px-Simple_Music.svg[1].png$
T.V.	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\Raseone-tv[1].png$
Video Games	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\controller-161580_640[1].png$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\button_eyed_video_game_characters_1[1].jpg$
Movies	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\dvd_logo[1].jpg$
Bike	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\2648217927_92876ba92a_z[1].jpg$
Skateboard	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\clip_art_skateboard_1[1].jpg$
Friends	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\Zaynah_friends[1].gif$
Out-door play	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\soccer_clipart_1[1].gif$
In-door play	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\large-Lego-Blocks-0-3677[1].gif$
Library	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\Library[1].gif$
Yummy Snacks (sweets, chips, flavored drinks: EXTRAS)	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\30019[1].jpg$
All Extra Food (anything in excess of meat, bread, fruit/veggies, and water)	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\spaghetti%20dinner[1].jpg$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\large-Orange-Juice-166.6-5143[1].gif$
Weekend Day Trips (beach, pumpkin patch, etc)	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\cartoon-beach-6[1].gif$
Park	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\148586003[1].jpg$
Toys/games	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\iStock_000019407134Small[1].jpg$
Special events (holidays, birthday parties, etc)	$C:\Program Files (x86)\Microsoft Office\MEDIA\CAGCAT10\j0216588.wmf$
All items in room except the bed, 1 blanket, 1 pillow, and lamp	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\large-Single-Bed-66.6-12680[1].gif$
Bedroom door	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\Door-12722-medium[1].png$
Clothes (any clothes except school uniform)	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\folded-clothes[1].png$
Shoe choice	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\clipart0214[1].jpg$

Behaviors that earn and keep privileges

Behavior	Picture
Following instructions	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\0511-0902-1116-1963_Dad_Seeing_His_Daughter_Off_to_School_clipart_image[9][1].jpg$
Following Schedule	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\Schedule[1].gif$
Doing Chores	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\kidsclean1[1].jpg$
Being Kind to people, animals, and objects	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\aw4850[1].jpg$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\Mr.-Peabody-and-Sherman[1].jpg$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\algp66-Fragile-Sign[1].png$
Doing homework without complaint Showering	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\clipart0198[1].jpg$
Talking about feelings	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\talk[1].jpg$
Showing gratitude	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\clip_art_1[1].png$
Reading	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\comics_reading_by_joliet82-d4ng2ad[1].png$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\bee2[1].jpg$
Doing all responsibilities and commitments	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\A_Little_Boy_Making_His_Bed_Royalty_Free_Clipart_Picture_090402-167862-511052[1].jpg$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\boxing-gloves-159920_640[1].png$

Behaviors that lose privileges

Behavior	Picture
Disobeying	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\cartoon_frazzled_mother_doing_many_things_at_once_royalty_free_clipart_picture_090404-233608-479042[1].jpg$
Not following schedule or doing responsibilities	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\Schedule[1].gif$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\A_Little_Boy_Making_His_Bed_Royalty_Free_Clipart_Picture_090402-167862-511052[1].jpg$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\boxing-gloves-159920_640[1].png$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\clipart0198[1].jpg$
Not doing Chores	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\kidsclean1[1].jpg$
Being unkind with words or actions	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\SS8FZA7B\spoiled_brat2[1].gif$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\200px-Profanity.svg[1].png$
Complaining or whining	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\GoodGrief[1].jpg$
Being Destructive	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\gif_pencil201[1].gif$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\large-broken-caravan-0-11423[1].gif$
Being Violent	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\Ecole-violc[1].png$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\484px-PEGI_Violence_hell.svg[1].png$
Saying Bad Words	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\4OVZBV98\notalking[1].gif$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\bleep1[1].jpg$
Being Defiant or disrespectful	$C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\WMLP8858\0511-1004-0916-3150_Cartoon_Mothers_with_Their_Good_and_Bad_Kids_clipart_image[1].jpg$ $C:\Users\kellyb\AppData\Local\Microsoft\Windows\Temporary Internet Files\Content.IE5\61E13JX3\bullying-739607gif[1].png$

Parenting my Defiant Child

Saturday, October 24, 2015

Privileges to be earned or taken away based on behavior

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